Desk Jokester T-Shirts

'They're draft outlines on how to run a paperless office.'

'It's only temporary.'

'Friday is casual day, Mr Figgs.'

"According to the latest research staff retention is more likely to be improved but improved conditions rather than chaining them to their desks."

Laptop Dancing.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

'Got to admit,as far as mission statements go, it's pretty damn bold.'

'Can you do more work then is humanly possible?'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

"Hire a cost cutting, bad-guy consultant to turn me into a good guy during the layoffs."

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

"You're good at asking all the right questions. Now let's hear some right answers."

Chritmas Party - "What in our own time?"

Clowns in the board room: 'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to, well, pie.'

'Yes, we do have an incentive scheme.We call it 'continued employment'.'

"Personally, I'd like to hire you, Mike, but the company has some serious concerns about your core competencies!"

'I recognize the face ... I just can't pin down the name.'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"Progress is going around in the same circle...but faster."

Smoke and mirrors.

'We like your style, but hate your substance.'

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"If you really want to get ahead you'll need to stop licking your own butt and start licking mine."

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"Make sure the coffee has extra caffeine. I want the employees awake during overtime."