Desert Stories Fan Pillows

"Meet the author"

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

The americanisation of vulture.

"Valet park only"

Drawing on an island.

"I could have sworn Arizona was landlocked."

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"

Ship in a Bottle

Depressed Cactus

'Uh, Jake, I believe that should be 'and the skies are not cloudy all day,' not 'and we pour ourselves more Chardonnary.''

'Good news is that after two weeks buried in this desert, nobody will call us 'Paleface' anymore!'

'I'm sorry, Frank, but I think I need some space.'

Cactus Uses An Umbrella When Raining.

"He's the strong, silent type."

'Welcome to Arizona,,,bring your own water'

Fat angel eating halo like doughnut

All the other camels paid Edna alot more attention after she got her implants...

"Personally I think he over does the self grooming."

Proposed Site for New Three Storey Mirage

'Swimming back to the mainland to see some football game is stupid. Besides you're so out of shape, you wouldn't get 10 feet.'

"What? No Vanilla?"

"A full stomach and a sunny spot: that, my boy, is the secret of happiness..."

'Inexpensive organic food! ... Inexpensive organic food!'

'Are your arms getting tired?'

'…dial tone…dial tone…dial tone…'

'Her and her silicone implants!'

'That's all very well - but just suppose everybody decided to take 'just one bloody miserable bucket of sand'?'

Desert - Steep Hill sign.

'And have you ever sat in the sun before?'

'Oh wait, I've got a good one! I spy with my little eye.'

"I didn't think we'd be LITERALLY offshored."