Demotivation Enthusiast Pillows

"Last year I didn't meet any of my work goals, so this year my goal is to fail at everything"

Changing Minds

'I believe in a 'carrot and stick' approach to motivation. The carrot is not to use the stick.'

'My team likes to see me spring into action.'

'You are a self-starter... problem is, you never finish anything.'

Dedication to excellence....

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

The words 'Well done ' take seconds to say, but will be long remembered and appreciated.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Peacock of Productivity

"It's not often you see a sign that is both instructional and inspirational."

Thank you to our awesome NHS staff

"So let's all remember... 'Believe in yourself' and others will believe in you!"

Leadership never hibernates.

"He just returned from a motivational seminar."

A problem is opportunity in working clothes.

"Maggots! That's what ya' remind me of! You've gotta want that fish head."

Think Big.

IF A MOO CAN RISE TO THE TOP, SO CAN I

"Behold! NOW is the accepted time to repent!"

"I think you need to reboot your carrot."

"Your aptitude is important, but more important for success is your attitude."

Man with a 'Think bigger' sign has a bigger office than a man with a 'Think big' sign.

'Last quarter's sales figures were disappointing but don't be discouraged. Let's double our efforts and remember that it takes both sunshine and rain to make a rainbow.'

"We did our best to convince them, now it's up to how gullible they are."

'It's time once again for the morning motivational roar.'

'Sir, you have a couple of salesmen laying for you out here.'

". . .and so the Defense rests, based on those facts, to the best of my manipulation."

Cheerleaders from another planet

Anthony Rottweiler: Motivational Dog Speaker

"Does he respond better to a confident approach or a groveling approach?"

'Retire now and we'll throw in this set of steak knives! But wait, that's not all...'

"Any cocktail can be a shrimp cocktail if you just set your mind to it, and if you carry lots of loose shrimp in your pocket."

What's STM? Seize the moment!