Delivery Person Pillows

'Open up Clayton, you knew it was inevitable.'

'Oh oh...this isn't my mace, it's whipped cream!'

'Emily, have you been shopping online during class?'

'I appreciate the offer but we already have someone supplying our nuts.'

Inflating helium balloons to transport them.

Worker is confused at the Paradox Parcel Company.

'He says you demolished his front door when you delivered the paper this morning.'

'Where does this go?'

Transporting helium balloons in mid air.

"This feels a little over the top for pad thai."

Gun factory shooting the DHL messenger

Discreet Shipping

Well here's the problem. Part # AB5 is a Nuclear Missile. Part # AB6 is an ink cartridge.

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

'It's a side gig.'

"Hi! I'm Carl, from Amazon fulfillment. Would you mind telling us how you feel about your online shopping experience?"

Pizza delivery

'Hurry up: We've sprung a leak!'

'This is a Christmas parcel from 1992. Hey, thanks to this belated delivery, you didn't get in trouble with your parents for opening this present early!'

'Never mind why, Larry. . . just get someone over to the hospital and retrieve that other order.'

'Are you sure it is to be delivered to this floor?'

"It says, 'To deter Porch Pirates, we've thrown your package on your roof'."

'Yes, they delivered the piano, but I should warn you about something.'

U. S. POST OFFICE, 'How can I guarantee delivery?'

Clerk: 'Boy that Delivery guy sure has a THICK accent!'

"Back in my day there weren't any delivery trucks, distribution centers and fancy computers! We just hopped door-to-door until our feet bled!"

Beware of the Cat

'After thousands of miles and millions of homes, I finally get to rela...'

Generosity Unparalleled

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

Insufficient Postage: Return to Sender.

Sam's Venison.

'I was very careful with your wine shipment. I tossed it on your porch underhand.'

'What - No lift?!'

Bush Air Conditioning