Decade Transition T-Shirts

Old year sits by 'Out' box, and new year sits by 'In' box in office.

The fate of the emigrant

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'Yes, death signifies a cosmic change of address. Alas, your husband's mail will not be forwarded.'

'Chicken soup for dummies who don't sweat the small stuff.'

"Hon, I'm taking your advice and starting a new chapter."

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

Doubt or Certainy

"That's O.K., Dad. I think I'll do with the ambient waterfall sounds tonight."

'So push has come to shove...'

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

Women

PastFuture.

"Just be happy you're getting in, worry about your hair later."

"Hello, I'm the bluebird of quiet resignation."

"Yesterday we're caterpillars, today this. Can't wait to see what's next."

"I love the smell of unemployment in the morning."

"To tell you the truth, I never thought downward mobility would be so, well, downward."

'You're at that awkward age where the others have figured out that you're a drone and you don't do anything.'

"The 10th anniversary gift is tin. I got Ralph a new tinfoil hat. He's more sedate with the extra channels."

"You said 'give me a cool hairstyle...' You never specified which decade."

"Before you go inside, give me a chance to explain the mess ..."

"Son, I really wish I could tell you that "Cowboy Ballerina" is a normal part of growing up, but... it's not."

"I can't believe we've been married for 10 years and you never told me you had another leg!"

"Listen, Mom, I'm not your little girl anymore."

'Oh no, not you again,'

'Get Offa My Lawn!'

Newly Non-Mega-Rich

"You remind me of why I found the eighties wanting."

Feliz Navidad! Thanks for 10 great years!

"There doesn't seem to be an end to the Eighties revival."

"When I was small, I used to be so busy. I was always running here and rushing there. Go, go, go. That was me. Now I just ride my bike or sit around watching mindless junk on TV. My life just keeps getting better and better all the time."

One Way (But Not Necessarily the Right Way.)

I found the most amazing Youtube show. It's about an angel who helps people. Oh yeah? Yeah. And he drives around with some burly guy with a big beard. They wear '80s clothes and don't have any special effects. It's a perfect period show. Wait … are you talking about "Highway to Heaven"? That's not a period show, that was made in the '80s. Even you have to know that. Thanks for ruining it for me.