Death Star Decorator Mugs

'Now it fits.'

"It's only fair. He has a man cave."

No one ever discovered Mad Jake's secret: he was taking a correspondence course in interior decoration.

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

Super glue . . .

'This guy's FAST!'

'They had a sale on electric green.'

Traumatology.

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

'We couldn't agree on the wallpaper.'

"No, not there! It'll block out all our light!"

Wallpapering 3

'...My tree! - No my tree!!'

"Is this the first time you've put wallpaper up?"

"It may not be the hardwood floor we were hoping for, but it's SO much better than that hideous carpeting!"

"If anyone asks, I did this."

'The meteor saved us a bundle on a rock garden!'

Wallpaper over a door.

"I guess they really are permanent."

"Things to do Today: Create the heaven and the earth."

"When you can't actually see the tree, it may indicate that you are too festive."

'I hear one more person say 'my bad'. I'll wring their neck!'

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

'Wow! That must have been one hell of a good salesman!'

"No smoking, except in designated Fire and Brimstone areas."

"For some reason they put mannequins of us up every year."

Bed, Bath & The Beyond

And on the Eighth Day God Just Puttered Around the House

Santa with a mobile made from presents.

"You also get a choice of finishes ? flat, semigloss or satan."

"Rough week, Gourdie?"

"The old pearly gates looked nice, but they were hell to maintain."