Dealing With Rejection Mugs

"Your book is a masterpiece, but, unfortunately, we're rather picky."

'... Well, at least it wasn't a total refusal. She did say she'd go out with me if hell freezes over!'

'I didn't pass the audition for the School Choir: They said I had a squeaky voice...'

'Not getting into university is not going to stop me doing the things I hoped to do...'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

"But honey. . . he's just not our kind!"

"I wish you would actually sell one of these novels...all these returned manuscripts are giving me backaches!"

worker rejects promotion to protect deniability

'I'm sorry, Bennett; but we gave the job to O'Toole. You have the know-how, but he had the know-who.'

Rubbish, Poppycock, Balderdash

'Sorry, but I don't think you're right for our company.'

'I'll say one thing about your manuscript, Mr.Jackson - it's very shreddable.'

'Hold the Ferguson report. Ed's had enough information for the day.'

Mr. Chester's diplomacy

"I can't stand reality. What makes you think I'll enjoy it virtually?"

"The following program contains adult situations designed to make you feel bad about your life."

It's sweet of you to ask, Randy, but I've decided just to rent some Mel Gibson movies instead.

'It's from the New Yorker, I've been rejected 200 times, once for each word.'

'How long have you been submitting novels, Grandad?'

"Cheer up, Nicole! What does Princeton know? Say, you got any plans for that last bit of cobbler?"

"Have you considered applying for a job a million mils from here?"

'Did you get the promotion?'

"Sorry, but she says she's not interested. She just wants to play the field."

"We're not celebrities, and we don't want to get out of here..."

'No, no, of course I think you're beautiful ... it's just that, ever since you showed me those baby pictures of you ... well, I just can't seem to get those images out of my head.'

Learning curve: 'Your book was crap!'

'It's an organ rejection form letter!'

'Trubshaw, your application for the serious crime squad has been rejected!'

"Give us a few days and we'll call to tell you we've given the job to someone else."

"Slammed the door in your face, huh? Guess she really meant that NO SOLICITORS sign!"

'I just wrote a novel on this phone and sent it to 137 publishers and got back 129 rejections in 12 seconds.'

"Thank you for your submission! This is a notification that your rejection letter is being prepared and will be sent out as soon as possible."

Aisling is dismayed by the Board's decision.