Dealing With Attraction Pillows

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"O.K., she's sitting fown to write in three...two....one...."

"Eres la chica mas linda del mundo."

"These cartoons are insulting! I don't like it at all! I would never watch something that shows Latinos like this!"

As Seen On TV

'Seriously folks...'

Valentine man in underpants.

Sexy Slot Machine

Banana striptease...

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"I give all new teachers the same advice. First you have to get the attention of the class. Can you quack like a duck or juggle two books in the air?"

"She seems nice. A little clingy... but nice."

"You get your money back if your don't get laid in seven days."

"You want my undivided attention? I don't think it exists."

'Efficiency,' he whispered.

"I'll say it worked-he showed the white flag alright last night!"

"See? You don't need fancy window displays to attract attention...just get some police tape!"

"How come there's no exit?"

Q-Tip Company across from the Earwax Museum.

"You know, Estella's pretty cool."

"By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms and conditions printed on my panties."

'I think he wants you to be quiet!'

A street vendor advertises 'Beefcake'.

"It's been tested in a harem."

Man Trying to Attract a Mate With Peacock Feathers.

Monster in Bath

'It would never work, Lenny - I'm a good cop and you're a bad cop.'

I don't care if you are top or bottom, you've got my head spinning upside-down!

'Oh great, here comes that creepy guy from entomology class!'

No Texting! Don't Even Think About It!

Model wilderness

"Oh, oh! I see cameras! They're here for me. Photo op time! Out of my way, fools!"

"I've decided I'm going to be positive all the time."

'I know you hate commercials, but must you surf for them just so you can mute them?'