Deal-making Devotee Prints

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

"I always cry at mergers."

It's a deal. You give me five analysts, three pundits, seven technicians and a soothsayer. I give you six experts, five professors, four consultants and a prognosticator.

'Someday we'll look back on this and think, ‘Why the hell didn't we sue?' '

...and if the Chairman rings, find out who he is.

'No hostile takeover bids beyond this point.'

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

"...And please let the merger do through!"

'Why don't we try a renegotiated buyout offer before we go with the Plague of Rabid Bats thing.'

"Remember, negotiating is like buying fruit. You don't know what you'll get until you squeeze 'em a bit."

'The trick is to be gentle yet firm in negotiations. I prefer soft money and hard liquor.'

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"I came, I saw I takeovered."

"Don't anybody move: this is a merger."

'The business is worth $125,000, tops. We expect Google to offer us three billion.'

"Grandma is included in the purchase price."

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Hit me.

'Sorry for interrupting. I didn't realize you were still trying to hammer out an agreement.'

Apostle shopping at 'Aeroapostle' Store.

"I told you negotiations would be more fun without a battery of lawyers."

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

'So, anyone have any idea how we go about explaining how we made a hostile takeover bid for one of our own subsidiaries?'

'Michael left me because of my extreme couponing...at least I think he left me.'

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just picking up the pieces after a traumatic investment."

"The usual day. We took over somebody, then somebody took us over."

Hostile take-over.

"Perhaps we can arrive a a mutually beneficial arrangement?"

'Lots of give and take in that negotiation...they took and we gave.'

"Beans! I got a bag of magic beans!"

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I thought you wanted me to sell your car.

'I didn't know he was also into corporate mergers!'