Dating World Commentators Mugs

'You will never require the services of a dating agency.'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

"It's a legal document authorizing you to carry out a Do Not Resuscitate order on my behalf, although heaven knows, you have a hard enough time cancelling a magazine subscription."

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

'No, he didn't have any last words,his wife was in there and she did all of the talking right up to the end.'

Man in traffic jam watches couple row while eating popcorn.

"What on earth do they find to talk about?"

"Oh, you were on automatic pilot? And what about her? Was she on automatic pilot, too?"

"Now who's being judgy?"

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

'So, did your marriage counseling work?', 'It sure did! -- She ran off with the marriage counselor!'

'So is this your lazy days of summer, or are we still working on spring?'

"Yes I know...she just needs a passport!"

'oh...You're home, just when my spirits were rising.'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

"I don't see what you see in him."

'I'm no good at sports, so I'll just have to settle for a trophy wife.'

"I said I was sorry. No need to bite my head off!"

"Sorry I'm late... I was getting our date approved by my lawyer."

"I liked you better as my first husband."

Elderly spinster commenting on a marriage

"And he's caring and honest and gentle..." "I'd do her."

'We have separate bedrooms because I snore and because I can't stand the sight of her.'

Bread Winner-Need More Dough

"I don't want to get too serious."

"I married him for his intelligence, turns out that was artificial as well!"

'I prefer to hire married men to bachelors. Married men don't get upset when I shout at them.'

"I was being myself like you advised. That's when she dumped me!"

'Nothing grows in the shade.'

'No wonder I never have time to do anything else. I'm a one woman news team.'