Dating Drama King Gifts

'I'd invite you in, but I've given up jackasses for Lent.'

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"You owe me five bucks."

"I can't believe he brought her."

Jack Gleeson

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"I take it you got the lead in the school play."

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"Dad, why do they tell actors to "break a leg?""

Next, I recall looking down at myself and thinking, God, what a drama queen.

'Silly me. I thought his 'Catch and Release' bumper sticker referred to his philosophy on trout fishing.'

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'What's the diagnosis?' - '*Cough*' - 'It's not good, I'm afraid.' - 'Tell me. I have to know.' - 'You have man flu, Peel.' - 'Why, God? Why?!!' - 'I'm so sorry.' -

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

Love Bites: The Dating Game - "No, he loves me more!"

Newborn sees his new father viewing him in hospital nursery thinks "Showtime.".

'This isn't the kind of animal magnetism I like in a man, Frank.'

"I'm sorry Sharon, I couldn't possibly come in for unprotected coffee."

'I know I said you could take me home but I didn't mean to your place!'

"He's a terrible drunk."

"The season finale of the world is near."

"I this series he plays a real dramatic roll."

"Do you think we could stop using 'Julius Caesar' in the role plays?"

Outside the Soap Opera Screen Actors Guild.

Roy felt it was important to act out any side effects that a prescription might cause.

Audition. Script. He plays every role with that scowl --- His motto is "Anything you can do, I can do bitter."

"Will you please cut the 'Alas, poor Yorick' bit and open that chest?"

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"Well, it's the end of the school year...when everyone finally gets serious about getting a good grade."

"Don't be so dramatic, you've only got a cold!"

It's a thin line between judge and chaperone, your honor. Try not to cross it. !