Dating Dilemma Debaters Pillows

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but actually 47% of 235 people covering 34%..."

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

'I've spent a fortune wining and dining you today Julie and now you tell me you love Picasso!'

Darn it, you're touching my half of the loveseat again. (Published originally on Feb. 20, 2008.)

'Darling, wake up, I've just realised ... we're not HD ready.'

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

"Will you be passing a mailbox?"

'Is this the Lonely Hearts Club?'

'It's silly to jump at the first man who comes along.'

'Some have a love life - I have a 'can't-stand-for-the-man-to-be-right' life.'

"I was being myself like you advised. That's when she dumped me!"

'You were right, doc. Blood is thicker than water.'

"The Court finds itself on the horns of a dilemma. On the one hand, wiretap evidence is inadmissible, and on the other hand I'm dying to hear it."

Weddings...

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

I always strike out on blind dates

"She dumped me the minute I flunked out of medical school."

"Uh-oh this is going to be a tough one."

Cops at domestic scene with the Hickenloopers.

'I'd offer you a ride home, but my car's only a one-seater.'

"I like that you refuse to be defined by your generation."

The Electoral Trolley Problem

'So now I've got a dollar burning a hole in my pocket...'

"Dating is hard when you feel like people only like you for your legs."

"It will be nice to get out, have a few bitter generalizations, and come home."

"Where you want to hunt and gather tonight?"

"No, I can't come out tonight, Darren. I'm washing my hair."

"Take you for granted? Jerome, I’ve always thought of you as my No. 1 backup date."

'Bring my daughter back at 11 sharp or...'

"I swear, the only decent men around here are either married...or gay...or they're one of my ex-husbands!"

'Men never appreciate what's at stake in a relationship.'

"You know I'm pre-loved."

Hypothetically speaking, how would you suggest a normal man attract a spectacular woman? "Normal"? Like you and me. I mean, not all guys can work out six hours a day. Not every man can be a muscle-bound oaf whose only apparent quality is his animal magnetism. I can hear you in there! No offense, Randy!