Data Devotees T-Shirts

"I just can't be with someone who won't express their emotions as viable data."

"Sometimes late at night I'm not sure the leading economic indicators know where they're going."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

Fear/Knowledge

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

"Good invisible exports figures this quarter, sir."

'If I may say so, business is booming.'

"You've got computer-breath."

Big Data Tonight

Person with eyes focused on a computer screen.

"I love your optimism."

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

Bottom line, is that the sweet smell of success or your aftershave?

Real data visualization specialists are 100% committed to their profession.

'These latest figure are encouraging...'

"I'll never forget you."

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

Today's love

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

Aggression/Security

'Just do the presentation Williams and let the numbers speak for themself.'