Danger Darling Pillows

“I heard von Schleflin yell ‘Eureka,’ and then kerblam!”

"Eat me"

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Thank you for purchasing the first modular dressing kid for guys

Sword Swallow is Bitten by a Mosquito.

The hall of bad ideas.

"Vernon likes an element of danger in a water feature..."

Memorable Travel Adventure: 'I was in Florida, and on a whim, decided to wrestle an alligator.'

'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'

Avalanche skiing is a RUSH!

Man putting his head in a lion's mouth

'We're here to talk to your son about his website...'

Ladies who lunch.

"This isn't a fixer upper. It's a down-and-outer."

The Croucho Club

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

"I just love what you've done with the place!"

Despite hard evidence to the contrary it was still considered lucky to kiss the Blarney Spike

"Don't eat anything fatty...you're not listening, Fatty...I said, 'Don't eat anything!'"

Snakeboarding.

You should all get along beautifully. Fred handles toxic wastes, Doris works at a nuclear reactor, and Walter just isn't taking any chances.

'Inventions gone bad! Nuclear sparklers.'

Death Defying Stunt.

"Words with Friends with Benefits."

'Caution! Quick sand in this area.'

Dagger Juggling Circus Act Goes Wrong

'This is a killer hole!'

'Those are my best tights, don't you dare ladder them !'