Cynical Gazer Mugs

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"...Our extensive in house survey found that 82% of you think in house surveys are a waste of time."

'I suppose they call it the rat race because only rats ever seem to win.'

"Lets get 100% behind the boss."

The Forever Stamp

'The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. That's a wonderful mission statement.'

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

'Waiter! -- there's a candidate in my soup!'

Utopia - a necessarily restrictive and conformist social structure.

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

"They're at that age where it's only cool to wag ironically."

"Life sucks and then you keep living."

"If the press brings up your past just double down on 'The sky is falling!'."

Will Self deprecation

Dirty Tricks Dept.

"At the end of the day it's just a sunset."

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

"He's been up all night and fell asleep at the wheel."

The Ultimate Reality TV Show: Apathy Island

Federal Bureau of Do As We Say, NOT As We Do!

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

Once a politician is elected, his work is over.

"Do I still believe in Santa Claus? I don't even believe in Congress."

'That's it?'

'Well, John, in the past two years you've gone from being extremely depressed to being basically unhappy like the rest of us. My work here is done.'

'This model comes with F.S.H - P.S. - E.W. - C.C. - A.B.S and B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.'

"Robust, full-bodied bouquet with just a hint of bitter, mean-spirited despair."

"Nah...not really...he's only won one game!" (Clever dog).

'It's a deal -- I'll introduce a bill to bail out your country club, and you'll introduce a bill to bail out my country club!'

"To be perfectly frank, the preceding was a paid political bunch of lies."