Customer Service Humor Pillows

'We found your luggage! It went to Buffalo!'

"You guys have sold me wrong parts three times! Your ad says 'Auto y Rod employees are the friendliest experts in town.' What can we do about this?"

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'Your call may be monitored to give us a few good laughs.'

If you don't give me a free hot chocolate, you're probably not a patriot. #$%* Fox News.

'Oh, hello Dave. Would you like that in untraceable, used notes, like last time?'

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'Would you like a room on the sunny side, sir? Haha, just kidding!'

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

"I'd like to leave a wake up call for, . ... OHH ..., April."

"I must be getting on tech-support's nerves, because they now answer by saying, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT NOW?!"

'Tellers laughing ' 'Can I have my statement?'

'You are through to 24/7 support...our helpline times are between 8am and 7pm.'

"If your internet doesn't work, please check our online help chat...if your internet doesn't work..."

"Your prayers may be recorded for quality and training purposes and will be answered by the next available deity."

"But the good news is that if you get a life threatening illness...then you'd get a decent payout."

"What's this I hear about you opening an account at another bank?"

"What makes you think you can patronize me?"

"We've had to update our restaurant's motto."

'For kicking our salesman down the stairs, we take 10 euros extra charge, sir!'

Heck Support.

'What's wrong with me today? I actually served a customer...'

'Everything works fine? Don't worry, sir! We'll mess it up for you!'

'No! Not rare, not medium, not well-done: I want my steak raw! Thank you...'

"Well, I have arranged the pick-up of your shipment, sir. Do you already want to raise the complaint about the miscarriage, sir?"

'They didn't fit when you got them home? Maybe your contents settled during shipping?'

How was your oatmeal, Sadie? Is everything good? Can I get you anything else? Wait a second, what's that flapping? Somebody, run to the window and tell me if you see a pack of hogs flying by! Has the sky fallen? Has hell frozen over? Has the sun risen in the west? Have chickens grown teeth? Has a donkey climbed a tree? This is the first time in 16 years that you've bothered to ask me how my meal's going, is what I'm saying, you worthless baboon! I wonder why.

Robbers, burglars and shoplifters welcome! Our employees are trained to cooperate with you!

The poop scooper maid.

'Would you care for a drink while you're being ignored?'

"The complaint department is next door."

Satan gets his pictures back from the photo lab.