Curmudgeon Enthusiast Mugs

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I'm 66 years old: and I going to be as crabby as you? - Rolf. *Actual reader letter. Rolf, this is really a sad, unfortunate letter. It seems unlikely you can ever achieve any reasonable level of crabby if you're the kind of loser to send such a whiny question. Great crabs are born, not made! Guy probably won't even make a decent curmudgeon. Not sure that's what he's hoping for.

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

Football Crazy strip six

How lazy people decide what to eat

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

Mum! What's for dessert?! - 'Yoghurt!' - 'Vanilla?' - 'Peach Melba.' - 'Don't call childline, don't call childline, don't call childline, don't call childline.' - '' -

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'Ah, Garbanzo, truly you are a noble bean.'

'What's wrong with you?'

"Something nocturnal."

'I know we had some good time together, Muriel, but a permanent relationship is out.'

I hope Bernie Sanders wins. We've never had a president like him. We've had cool presidents, awkward presidents, dignified presidents, goofy presidents

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

"I can't help you with your chronic whistling. You don't need a psychiatrist, you need a musicologist!"

'Why don't you change it to sports or cartoons or something? -- You know CNN just depresses you.'

Who needs Facebook friends when you've got billions of friendly gut bacteria?

'He eats his yogurt and carrot sticks out of a grease-stained brown bag to preserve his macho image.'

Robinson le Creusot

"Care to try the dip? It's posthummus."

Circus News

"The inspector's not getting older. He's getting odder."

I HATE STUFF

Uncle Murray Weekly

Square peg in a round hole: 'I say if it feels right, do it.'

"Hello. This is the old man across the street. Get off my lawn!"

"Thanks goodness, I thought she was pregnant?"

Monster Bathrooms.

"Honey, I can’t find it … they have too many Greek yogurts. No, I’m not crying!"

'Your generation should be more like that yogurt you eat. At lease that culture's active.'

Victorian Children's Party

Yogurt, of course, is highly cultured.