Cultural Irony Lovers Gifts

"Today the secret ingredients for Mom's Apple Pie were sold to the Japanese for sixty-eight million dollars."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

End the Winter Blues

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

Right-thinking people against wrong-thinking people

Leaking Hudson River paintings.

Please help. Always in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Dear Diary, 36 weeks on this island and I'm starting to feel that I'll never get rescued."

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

'You're proposing to me with, cubic zirconias?... But, you're a diamond dealer!'

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

"Of course no one wants a forest fire anywhere, anytime. It can be devastating. That's why I feel so guilty."

'The NHS is committed to patients having control over their care...So if you'd like to check your symptoms online I'll be back later for a diagnosis and careplan.'

'I'm afraid Mr. Caldwell doesn't want to see you now. However, you're free to visit his web site.'

"Hang on a tick, lads, what have we here?"

'This pie chart clearly demonstrates the distain with which most people regard pie charts.'

"When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one person to dissolve the marital bonds which have connected her with another..."

Clancy: Extending Overdrafts

"No worries. I'm well-prepped and ready for anything they might throw at me."

"Oh sure, it's easy to blame your husband, when he's not here to defend himself."

You're Out Of Order

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

"Anyone else would have ship wrecked us on a south seas island."

Perfection Troubleshootors.

"From where I'm sitting, ha-ha, you're behind bars!"

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.