Culinary Jokester T-Shirts

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."

'Just mash them the old-fashioned way, Doris.'

Burgers....condiments...First Aid.

'I'll have a BLT.' 'ASAP or PDQ?'

'You can do whatever you want, Herb, but I sure wouldn't take advice from a bowl of alphabet soup!'

Recipe: Personal Peanut Butter

'It's actually cheaper than the bait shop.'

"Why didn't you think of that before I put on the icing?"

"You asked for the soup of the day, you didn't specify what day."

Annual Butcher's Meating.

'Did you order the soup in a hurry?'

"I'm sorry, but I made a big mistake by running off with you. I'm really in love with the fork."

'I'm going to bake you a sponge cake...where do we keep the sponges?'

Rich-boy sandwiches, at poor boy prices!

'I'm sorry, sir, but cheeseburgers are out of season.'

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

"Management wants a word with you."

Baguette Skiing

Hell's Kitchen specials: Lawyer thermador, barrister kabobs, litigator flambe, attorney tartare.

"The Blueberry Bagel, having triumphed on the East Coast, heads West."

'This parrot stew keeps repeating on me.'

Headless Chicken picking out chief in a line up

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

'We don't have any seafood, sir, but I could soak some pork in salt water for you.'

"It's nothing...probably something I just ate for dinner."

Hmmm...tastes peppery!

"This sub tastes much better with some traffic jam."

"What a workout! I'm covered in broth."

"This is your captain speaking. At this time we ask you for an occupation and something you'd find in the kitchen."

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Soup of the month.

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

"That's it. We’re toast."

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."