Criticism Navigator T-Shirts

'What's your usual response to criticism?' - 'Extreme surprise.'

Four Types of Critics

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

Herman Mankiewicz

Reading my Critics

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"Never mind, Harry. Just remember, the 'Saturday Review' loved it."

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

Suggestions and Cheap Shots.

Sculptor's chippings

"The audience is really classy tonight, they are throwing quail eggs."

Confused drivers

Who's In Charge Here?

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

Confirmation Bias

Art Critics.

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

Organizational Flow Chart: Puppets

"Has our apologist been alerted?"

'Typical phallic egocentrism!'

"He's a mental-health critic."

"It's taken her years to develop that naive, spontaneous, style."

"It's too academic."

"A restaurant critic! I hope she doesn't make this place sound too good."

"I think it would look nicer in red."

When you are most likely to be stabbed in the back

"But is it art?"

'There's a strong minimalist influence in this artist's work.' 'Good! The less there is of it, the better.'