Crisis Evader Mugs

'It's a simple two-part strategy. First, locate the hills. Then head for them.'

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

Binge Watch

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

'Of course you're a failure! Look at you - seventy-two and you've never had a mid-life crisis!'

Lady leaving a crisis management office past an emergency panic button.

'Before I mow the grass, I'd like to quote from section four, paragraph c, of the state child labor code...'

Return Of The Flu.

'What's the point of having a luxury car if you put it in the garage at night?'

"He's not good with change!"

'I'' be in the basement, Amy... below the radar.'

"Sorry. . . Houston isn't here at the moment - but if you'd like to leave a message. . ."

"We've taken out a second mortgage on our first one."

"I got an extension.'

Son disappears at the mention of helping out mom.

'I found I'm able to maintain my disposition by not watching any economic or employment news.'

Sales Downturn

'New dog?' - 'Yes, and no more food bills, no vets fees.'

The new, improved "Hide-A-Dysfunction" Slip Cover

Afghan Aid Workers Will Be Flown Out By/After August 31st, 2021

"Not now—I'm cooking to avoid intimacy."

"Math scares me so much I can't even add it to my list of anxieties."

"My boyfriend's got a split personality. Every time the check comes he splits!"

"What? Speak up! I can't hear you! I'm getting outside interference!"

'Avoid the elevators, avoid the flu,' reasoned Henry.

"A book report? -- Wouldn't that be a copyright violation?"