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Mismatched Lineups

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

"You're not grandma at all! In fact, I think this is a case of identity theft!"

'They're very proud of me. I'm the first in my family to be convicted of a white-collar crime.'

James Gandolfini in his driveway with a tablet

Mobsters at the Beach

Block Closed for Gritty, Hard-Edged Tale

'Try to think of this as a learning experience.'

"Now don't do anything flashy with the money, like pay off all your student loans at once."

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"I couldn't finish that book either."

"Let's try it again. Hand over your wallet, and this time, don't try anything funny."

"I like his style. He makes it look like an accident."

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

"You just said, ‘And then I killed my first and second husbands.’ ... Let's explore that."

Taking to the sky...

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

Fake Counterfeit Money

"Rehearsal's off! Our first violinist was apprehended early this morning poaching clams in Great South Bay! The authorities have confiscated her rake and long tongs!"

The Mousetrap, by Agatha Christie

"Your Honor, I wish to introduce as Exhibit A this bullet with the victim's name on it."

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

"I almost got away with it! Then somebody called in the SWAT team!"

"Remember - this meeting never happened, we never met, and you never wore that tie with that jacket."

"Any clues?"

'You can't arrest me -- I gave my power of attorney to another guy!'

'Same tragic story...A disgruntled athletic trainer burst into the locker room and starts taping players at random...'

"We have ways of making you talk."