Crime Comedy Admirer Pillows

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

Tree Thief

'Er! Wonder if they got any lead?'

A police steak out

'I am here, because I killed two people while I was sleepwalking!'

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Moses' Tablet

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

Falstaff

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

Cat Burglar

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

New Flavors at Where's the Scoop Ice Cream

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

Hamlet

If humans instead of dinosaurs had lived when the big asteroid hit.

'No, Ben, making your eyes go bigger does not make the fish grow bigger!'

"What other tricks does he need?"

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

Cheating Death.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."