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"Without your contribution here, th rest would be just meaningless numbers."

"Let's celebrate our first accomplishment!"

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

Wanna talk about it?

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Girl to girl: 'A friend is someone you don't have to call dibs with.'

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

'You put it down for five seconds. I get it now.'

"Congratulations! It's a boy! Quickly nurse! Get her phone and upload a picture to facebook!"

Sonographer and pregnant couple looking at images of the fetus on a screen with options to share the image on various social media platforms

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"Well...at least you don't s**t on my ideas."

'You know, it isn't the mother's texting while delivering that bothers, it's those damn selfies they upload to Facebook.

"Now, is this the kind of painting you mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Lessons.

'We're running late and I have much to cover. Can you hold your eight-part question for later?'

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

"Why do I bother to evangelize online when no one listens?"

Gone Lecturin'

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'She blogged her first word today.'

'Mom calls this a diary where you write private thoughts no one else can see. What fun is that?'

"Your daughter has 'I have something to share' syndrome."

Ear Bud Hijacking

"I did share! I gave Dougie all my melted candy."

Couple in bed. Man says: 'Are you BLOGGING this?'

"These photos are so great. I can't wait to post them during peak hours over the next week to maximise jealousy."

'So tell me more about your mother...'

'Now that we're married, I thought I should be less selfish. Here, take the TV remote while I get a snack.'

"And here's a shot of us showing you pictures from our last vacation."