Credit Line Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Walk softly and carry a large credit line.'

Men gossiping

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

The Personal ATM

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

'Enter, 'The Globoracy'.'

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

Man frozen in portrait pose.

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

'Would you like to dance?' Woman has 'No' written on her t-shirt. Guy has 'Why not?'.

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

Moliere

C Day Lewis.

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Agency Moody's comments

Charles Dickens.

Bookshop: Our Bestsellers - Empty Phrases

Bleak House

Can I ask you a question, man-to-man? Sure, little buddy. What do "man-to-man talks" usually consist of? What? I've never really had one, I don't think. What usually goes into them? Sports? Shaving? Carburetors? A little of this, a little of that. There's a proper ratio, of course. I'm not good at math.

"I said, you know why women talk more than men?" "What?" "I said, you know why women talk more than men..." "What?"

"We should probably talk about the elephant in the Roomba."

White Wine Wisdom (2)

"Thank you, gentlemen, and may the best networked man win."

The King of Salesmen says 'Why sir, I believe you need a new tie.'

'There's been a change in my recurring nightmare. I'm no longer falling . . . my credit rating is.'

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

"NOBODY LISTENS ANYMORE."

"Hold that afterthought!"