Creative Critique Collector Prints

"I should say, he is a little sensitive to criticism!"

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

Cariactures

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"I'm afraid you were drawn too big and not centered on the page."

Another Turning Point in History. Oh, the heck with it -- I'll never get these antlers right. Mickey Moose.

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

Brainstorm in progress.

'Can't you forget you were an art teacher?'

"I could do that."

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

We regret to inform you that your poem, "The Ramen," does not meet our publishing needs at this time. The short, frustrating career of Edgar Allan Typoe.

"He's been studying The Art of Bore."

"I think the banana looks like a mustache, or a weird smile or something. How about an apple? ... Just a suggestion."

"Just got back from the client meeting and great news. . . your work isn't dead. It's beaten senseless and run over by a dump truck...but still very much alive."

"Apparently my writing is so bad I've been rejected by a gene editor. She said she could see the lack of talent in my DNA."

"Well - and I'm not just saying this because you're my husband - it stinks."

Museum of Mediocre Art.

"His painting is actually better than it looks..."

'Let's go around the room, and talk about the edgy, creative things we've done so far today.'

"I call it 'You kids turn down that so-called music. I can't even hear myself scream.'"

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

"We had to lay off most of the staff to pay for the consultants."

'Denise, could you send someone in to fluff up the pile of cash I'm sitting on?'

"We're being sued because we don't have any women in top management!'"

"She was an excellent model, but her mother simply couldn't learn to trust me."

'Don't you think you may have overdone it with the layoffS?'

"This doesn't leave much room for creativity."

"Well, the x-rays show you have a little arthritis in your hands, but mostly they're just poorly drawn."

"Well, they certainly have brightened things up around here!"

Throwing Away Music

We'd like you to write us a catchy jingle...

'It's good but unlike your earlier work, I think this new style is more vulnerable to a potential downturn in the art world.'

'Three thousand of those, four thousand of those, five thousand of those...'

"Let's go to the womens' protest march to pick up some hot chicks!"