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Trial by Media

There's no such thing as "The Fruit Basket Defense." By any chance, are you referring to "The Fruit of the Poisonous Tree"? That's evidence that was obtained by an illegal action and must be considered inadmissible. Yeah! What you said!!!

''Twenty years'? -- I didn't know it was THAT illegal!'

"For details on the supreme court's ruling, here's my domestic partner and soon-to-be my legal spouse..."

Trump's 38th law suit thrown out of appeals court

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'

"Now that's a win."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth in what sense?'

Sue The Bastards

"Boy is he good! He's even got me convinced you're guilty!"

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

"The witness will confine his 'Knock knock' answers to 'Who's there?'"

'I can hardly wait for someone to invent paper.'

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

'Why is it always about me?'

'It wasn't a hate crime, Your Honor — I actually kind of liked the guy.'

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

"Repeat after me..."

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

'Then if there are no objections, we will recess until tomorrow morning.'

"Your honor, I intend to put the system on trial."

"My next witness is his Google Assistant."

"We, the jury, find the defendant."

"The Defendant must stop trying to side-step every question the prosecution asks!"

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

"Overruled."