Course Strategist T-Shirts

'He's trying to figure out a way to miss this putt so his boss can win the match.'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

Do your research!

"I've just barbecued my head again."

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"How was work?"

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Do you have any other skills?

'And finally. . . where do you see yourself on the food chain 5 years from now?'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Bob doesn't do well in job interviews, so he hired me. I'm a professional actor who specializes in these situations."

How did you get your parents to send you to Costa Rica this summer, Ingrid? By almost flunking Spanish. That's dire. Hardly! I'll party and practice my accent. Next year�remind me to bring my French grade down. Si!

'Thanks for the promotion offer but I was hoping to sleep my way to the top..'

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

Good Luck!

'You have to STUDY for tests, dummy -- you can't just put a memory stick in your ear!'

'It's a difficult position to fill. Someone who's smarter than me - and smart enough to pretend not to know it.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'Henry has found his niche with us.'

"Remember when everyone told you this job would lead you nowhere? Well, you've arrived!"

"The itsy-bitsy spider went up the corporate ladder. And he didn't care how many lives he ruined along the way. I know, this isn't the book Simon & Schuster wants. But it's the damn truth."

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"Yes, I'm sure you do deserve further career advancement. But if I promote you again you'll have my job!"

'Can I hand in my report tomorrow. Ms. D'Amato? I haven't finished reading the book. I've been too busy coloring it.'

"I'm thinking that now is a good time to start those tutoring sessions."

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'