Country Living Humorist T-Shirts

Cow watering lawn

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

I fart more than that!

A Venus cow trap.

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

The Mongolian Steps Slinky Cows.

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

I've been doing sit-ups!

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

Early American Think tank

COWS: Spare cow

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'