Couch Daters T-Shirts

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'Seriously. You have to get one of these.'

'Next, time, we'll meet at my place.'

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

'Long distance romances in the twenty first century.'

"Arthur, the bird's gone and done it again."

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

'That's a full ten minutes with the TV off. What now?'

"I am a control freak."

A slow-moving predator, the couch only needs to eat every few years.

'Why would you need GPS? Have you suddenly forgotten how to get from the couch to the refrigerator?'

Spud dating.

The four freedoms: freedom to bark, freedom from fetching, freedom to sleep on any piece of furniture, freedom from leashes.

"I've seen this film ten times and it's still awful."

"You know I always sit there for my keep fit programme!"

"Why can't you just bat the ball of yarn around like other cats?"

"I want you to be open and honest and to not leave any hair on the couch."

'Can Laura come out and bark at the moon?'

"Police have no suspects at the present time but believe that the motive for robbery was the desire for increased income."

WARNING - This Programme Contains No Strong Language.....

'There's nothing worth watching on TV, but he's not going to let a little thing like that stop him.'

'I told you, never utter that four letter work - 'walk!''

"Rayna, will you be my girlfriend?"

'Yes, it's a very interesting show, but we really need to talk about all the time you waste watching it - perhaps during the next commercial break.'

'He's training for the London Marathon,he watches it every year.'

'Rand and I decided to take our online relationship to a new level - real life.'

'Here we go again, Mr Gloez, you are NOT a couch mechanic!'

'She's not actually missing yet but I'll be in Brazil next week.'

Ventrilamatch.com

'I know we met on the internet, but stop double clicking that mouse every time you try to make a move.'