Corporate Growth T-Shirts

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

'This is where we shed all our inhibitions.'

Worldwide Global International Bank: 'Hey, man, it's Bank of America! They want to merge with us!'

'Yes, we know the universe is expanding, but what about Microsoft?'

'I never get any credit for all the years we upsized.'

'When we started the company it was just a little cottage industry.' 'Megaco Incorporated.'

"It started with noodle soup, but with a merger here and a takeover there..."

Mergers Acquisitions

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

Upward Progress

My brilliant career

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

"Your credentials are impressive, Carter but... quite frankly, Mr. Biggles doesn't seem to like you."

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

Soaring Profits

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"Why do you always assume I'm going down?"

"You've changed."

Considering she started here as an office temp she's done quite well.

"My rise in the company was solely based on convincing management that I was a nerd in high school."

“I know you’re really busy right now, but when you have a chance I’d love to pick your brain about how you got to where you are today.”

Building a company.

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."