Corporate Governance Specialist T-Shirts

"This bidder has the same name as you, and your face as their logo and you scored them top marks throughout this tender evaluation. Did you understand the conflict of interest declaration you signed?!"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Good boy."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

The president's men

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

'I've decided to step down as your CEO in order to spend more time in jail...'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'