Corporate Governance Specialist T-Shirts

"This bidder has the same name as you, and your face as their logo and you scored them top marks throughout this tender evaluation. Did you understand the conflict of interest declaration you signed?!"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Good boy."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

The president's men

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

'I've decided to step down as your CEO in order to spend more time in jail...'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'Office' block tightening it's belt

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'