Corporate Event Planner Gifts

"He's miming from a tape from head office."

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'I sent out for everything.'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

I could have danced all night!

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Build Your Own Portfolio

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

Inclusive speech

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Create some buzz!