Corporate Culture Buffs Pillows

'The company health plan doesn't cover surgery, but we do have a guy in sales who is pretty good with his hands.'

"But before we begin, this from legal, 'Be careful what you wish for.'"

'Our people will be in touch with your...er...you things.'

'Sir, do you want to lose your money because of bad management or do you prefer irresponsible speculative transactions, corruption and incompetence?'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

"At this office no two days are different."

"We have an acronym!"

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

Parade of Businessmen

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

"Do you have a minute, Bob? I'd like to speak with you about the concept of 'leadership'."

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

Let's Celebrate

"I think you might need to start again."

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

"Sophia, will you agree to form a joint exploratory committee for marriage?"

"I think we should try something a little simpler."

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."

Now that I finally have an expense account, there's no time to eat.

"We don't have an exercise room here. You'll stay in shape by climbing the ladder, jumping through hoops, toeing the line..."

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

Greed.

Change Management: Change can be ruf.

Dave realised that Clive didn't see problems,only 'challenges to be embraced'.