Corporate Corsair T-Shirts

Financial Pirates

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Welcome to the Team

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Parade of Businessmen

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

"You know, there's a corporate elevator."

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

'There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our kingdom has ever known.'

'Risky, but I like it!'

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

'This is the last time we post job openings,'

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

'I have a typical nine to five job. It's enough work for nine people and I'm treated like a five year old.'

"My boss says I intimidate people. . . so I stared at him until he apologized."

'I suppose they call it the rat race because only rats ever seem to win.'

Production: Urgent, Rush, Super Rush.

'You don't get a raise with this promotion, but you do get to call your work area a 'work station' instead of a 'cubicle.''

'He's a real high flyer!'

'I didn't realize we'd employed a cyber bully in you, Miss Tweedy.'

Twisted Peel works overtime.