Corporate Change Enthusiast Gifts

"Hey, Fred, how's my old office?"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

The MBA Draft

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

"We have an acronym!"

"At this office no two days are different."

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

Parade of Businessmen

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"I think you might need to start again."

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."

"I think we should try something a little simpler."

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

"We don't have an exercise room here. You'll stay in shape by climbing the ladder, jumping through hoops, toeing the line..."

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

Change Management: Change can be ruf.

Dave realised that Clive didn't see problems,only 'challenges to be embraced'.

"We owe our success to teamwork. Without it we could never have grasped at so many straws."

"Already sold your soul to the company? Listen, I'll have my people talk to their people."

"I appreciate your vision and work ethic but I have a budget. How much would it cost for your vision without work ethics?"

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

"Money is life's report card."