Corporate Acquisitions Mugs

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

Amazon buys MGM Studios...

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

A fight in the Boardroom.

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

"What's wrong with swallowing up other companies?"

"It's Swamp & Swallow - they're making an offer we can't refuse!"

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

Under new blame.

A woman wearing a skin sitting behind a desk with a nameplate that reads "Sheena, Queen of the corporate jungle."

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

Takeovers.

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"The torch is passed, but since the company is going green, I'm passing a high efficiency, solar powered multi LEC prism spotlight."

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

Considering she started here as an office temp she's done quite well.

Why am I running?

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

'With the firm growing at the speed it has there are bound to be a few problems...'

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.