Cooking Over Fire Fans Pillows

"Well, you were perfectly happy with my cooking before you discovered fire!"

Desert Island BBQ

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

Barbeque Casualty.

Ode to a Grill

'Guess what I've got for lunch today...a piece of my wife's delicious rum cake.'

Turtle Trailer Court

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

Hen, pig and cow sunbathing turn into fried egg,bacon and burger.

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

'An no one heard him scream when they screwed on the pump and slowly drained all his vital fluids...'

'Here go, Thegla... It recipe you ask for.'

'Uh, Jake, I believe that should be 'and the skies are not cloudy all day,' not 'and we pour ourselves more Chardonnary.''

Now that we can't afford heating oil our pension check is finally good for something.

'And stir to a smooth consistency.'

'Hey, Mr. Harris, I've got your fresh fire wood here, where do you want it?'

Dog in front of fire, wearing slippers, reading paper, smoking pipe, with tea and bones. Owner says: 'Stay!'

Nigella Lawson

Those who bought my cookbook with the transposed pages will get a refund. Those who actually enjoy Lobster Alfredo a la mode - bon app

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom or night will stop Ed from overcooking the fish."

I'll say one thing for that chef on TV...he really makes deboning a chicken look easy.

"The heat of the flames on my feet makes me feel thankful my feet aren't on fire."

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."

'Well, if you won't take us to the circus - Can we have a barbeque?'

Early 3D home entertainment systems.

"Have you tried using one of these?"

You have nothing to fear but fear itself, Al. I realize that, Dr. Kapuchnik. That's why I always have my fear with a side of fries.

Thank God it's Fry Day.

'The bill, you're joking! I never used to pay my mum.'

"Look, darling, I've recorded your favourite meal."

"Oh man. Tia Carmen's making that soup with all those weird vegetables."

Environmentally Friendly Technology: The wood burning key machine.

Ol' Man Winter in a stocking.