Contrarian Bookworm Pillows

How to profit by not buying books.

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

hard-boiled egg...

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

Censors 'no' a good thing when they see it.

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

The Da Vinci Cod

K9 Literati

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

Mars Poppins

Publisher. "The Laws of Motion " is a little dry for a title, Mr. Newton. How about something catchier like "When Push Comes to Shove"?

Bug reading book has antennae that are lights.

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

Trivia/Great Literature.

"At least she's reading."

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

"I guess that's the place for people too poor to afford a kindle, huh dad?"

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

A man reading 'Beach Chairs for Dummies'

Who says religion can't have a sense of humour.

'An ebook! What are you reading?' 'Against technology: From the Luddites to neo-Luddism.'

Library: The Weight lifting Section.

"I just remembered where I left my chew toy."

"So, you're telling me that you can't return, 'How to be a secret agent' because the final chapter instructed you to eat it after reading?"

1,000 places to see after you die by Shirley Maclaine.

A man uses a reaching tool to keep a book far enough out for him to read it.

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

The book is so much better than the film..

A dead plant in the environment section.

Pastoring for Dummies

"Do you have any bedtime stories that aren't about the former Yugoslavia?"

The Colonel at home.

Book signing The Art Of Forgery - "Gee thanks, Oprah Winfrey."