Contractual Cuisine Explorer T-Shirts

"The Attorney's Lunch—may I hear the warranty again?"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

La Table

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Like death by salad.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

Try to guess the continent dining...

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Strained carrots again! What am I being punished for this time?'

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Important Food Groups

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

French wine

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

Your lobster was off!

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

Our visit to the flan factory.

Sauce for the Goose

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

Before/After

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'