Content Monitors Pillows

Please examine your children's tv before they watch it as mistakes can not afterwards be rectified

Hate Platforms

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"'C' is for free CONTENT!"

"We occasionally remove content that is considered to be subversive, or a potential threat to public order and national security."

Social media and censorship...

"Fact amnesty"

'Those viewers who disagree with our editorial on TV violence has better keep their big mouths shut!'

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

Diner is served

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Our website design could be described as "organic"... in the sense that people often compare it to poop."

Nobody's reding our company blog,we need you to have sex with Mrs Miggins so that we can spice it up!

'I guess this is what we get for going to a discount web-page designer.'

Meet the People of the Internet

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

"After seeing the benefits of web analytics, Amy hoped to learn something by attaching cookies to customers who visited her store."

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

"Our social media statistics show us that people don't want our product. The want videos of cats."

'Our firewall barely protects our content.'

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

"Did you accidentally put the DVD of 'Taxi Driver' in her 'Wheels on the Bus' case?"

Editor

'I'm five weeks behind in my blog.'

Skinny P. monitors the compliance of social media standards.

"I deny causing any increase in hate speech."

"Your online comment meets the offence of serious insult. The 13 spelling mistakes in the 17 words of your comment constitutes a crime against the English language!"

"If I've got no messages how do I know I even EXIST!"

'These new electronic tags are fantastic, they really make it possible for managers to keep track.'

"Meta have stopped fact checking." "No they haven't."