Consumerism Satirist T-Shirts

Ed's Odd Job Lot.

Woman thinking about luxuries.

Pirates at the mall.

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

Expensive greeting cards.

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

"Who knew we'd be a desirable demographic?"

"Once you break through the plastic clamshell and blister packs, there won't be any packaging left!"

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

"They put nipples on the mannequins so you'll look at the stupid sweaters. Duh!"

Woman impulsively buying a book about how to stop impulse buying.

'The stuff legends are made of'

"I'm sure you want little Jimmy to have a complete set of 'Muscular Heroes of the Cosmos,' now, don't you, Mr. Bennett?"

Forecasters are two a penny. Supply exceeds demand.

Frozen Food - Pick Your Own

"I just got a Trump alert with my discount code off my next purchase of Trump baseball caps."

desert isle shopping trolley...

'The good news is, I got your Mum's cardigan.'

Pirate Captain Wears Pirate Slogan T-Shirt

"I'm going out to keep consumer spending in line with Wall Street expectations."

Instant Gratification service desk (with a long queue and delay)

"I balance my manic compulsive buying with manic buyer's remorse."

"Actually, take us to your gift shop first."

5 foot high or less aisle in a supermarket

'Corporations hijack government... details whenever we run out of commercials.'

"I admire their honesty -- I'll take six."

"Sales of our festive toilet cleaner have gone through the floor...it makes you worry that people have forgotten what the festive season is ALL ABOUT!"

"'Take that,' growled the writer as the buyer for Borders slumped to the ..."

Visit Our Gift Shop

"If we new this was going to happen we could have arranged some great TV sponsorship deals."