Conqueror Of Awkward Silences T-Shirts

"A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something."

'Couldn't you think of anything to say to Herb and Mary? They were nice enough to invite us over.'

'Well this is awkward.'

Trappist talk show.

"Cat got your tongue?"

"Wow . . . We could really fill this room with uncomfortable silences."

'I know I said you could take me home but I didn't mean to your place!'

"Our open office floor plan runs much smoother that no one communicates."

Along with being the first passengers on the space elevator, Fenwick and Charles set a new world record for longest awkward elevator silence.

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Let's not discuss it."

"It's 3D 4K HD - ideal for my old silent movie collection."

'Say when.'

"I wear it whenever I sack someone, I think it makes it less traumatic."

"Hi! Are you enjoying the peace and quiet?!"

'I checked that birds and bees stuff on the internet, Dad -- it says you're full of baloney.'

"A word of advice. . . next time you use the firm's intranet to send a message of undying love. Don't press 'send all'."

"With the benefit of hindsight, do you feel it was wise to dedicate your first children's book to Hitler?"

Desperate to break the ice, Bob and Lilly attempt 360s.

"Oh, the pain I can take—it's the awkward silence between conversations that's torture."

"Suddenly I can't think of anything to chirp."

No, I don't think a squeaky toy breaks your vow of silence.

'I'm from the exterminators, here to kill moths...Those devils, it's worse than I thought.'

"Oh, no! How are we going to divide this space by seven?"

I brought a little ice breaker.'

A young man creating an awkward silence

Bob longed to be part of the conversation – but the stupid forest never let him get a word in edgewise.

"I like that you refuse to be defined by your generation."

'If you can keep your trap shut, Furgis, you might be promoted to silent partner.'

Only thing she hated more than small talk was really, really small talk.

'Conquer the known world and, er...that's it.'

"And then, there was nothing more to say."

I don't know about you, but I've never felt so useless.

Frannie tries to look nonchalant as the copier erupts.

"Silence is pretty extreme - can we just take a vow of whispering?"