Connoisseur Of Fun Pillows

The Walk of Shame

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

I could have danced all night!

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Party Animals.

'He likes to power nap.'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Night of the Latkes

Farm Humor.

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Happy Hour

The Trojan Beagle.

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

The Snarky District

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

Emergency Phone.

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

Bangers and Mash