Conflict Resolver Gifts

'My instincts and intuitions are on opposing sides on this legal strategy.'

"Look, maybe you're right, but for the sake of argument let's assume you're wrong and drop it."

"When you say, 'It's all good' what you really mean is, 'I don't care'."

"Mary, will you stop this insecure nonsense? I didn't say Gladys was superior to you in any way. I only said I was in love with her, for God's sake."

'A mediator hasn't worked, so I brought in everyone's moms.'

'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'

'So we're agreed: we'll go to mediation.'

Restorative Justice Victim's Revenge.

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

"Scott, you'll be disqualified the next time you say, 'We'll just have to agree to disagree'."

'Let's meet halfway.'

Rock, paper and scissors fighting in office conference room.

"Now that you learned how to handle difficult students, you will have to learn how to handle difficult colleagues."

"I thought we agreed not to fight in front of the children."

'A good negotiator can stand back and gain perspective.'

'Yes, I work well with others - just not with these others.'

"There are too many players and a lack of coordination."

"Maybe you ought to consider making love in the morning - before you have a chance to piss each other off."

'Insofar as all parties have agreed to mediation, I've taken the liberty of hiring a medium.'

Without early resolution, conflict can take on a disproportionate life of it's own..

'That's your best advice? Play nice.'

'Those two alone should ensure I become a wealthy lawyer.'

"I admire Nesby because his agendas are never hidden."

'Remember, guys, there's no 'I'll kill you before I ever budge an inch on any position' in TEAMWORK.'

'You idiots. When I said settle it like men, I didn't mean real men.'

Negotiating Skills for Beginners.

'I don't suppose it occured to you to simply agree to disagree?'

"Actually we were hoping you'd be encouraging a more conciliatry approach to conflict management."

Caterpillar Tug of War

'Don't you two know any lawyers?'

'All right, all right, Hershman, you can go attend the 'improve your negotiating skills' seminar.'

An office worker at the conflict resolution center is stuck between a rock and a hard place.

'I couldn't resolve the conflict with the giant, so I severed the channels.'

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

"That's your best advice? Play nice!"