Company Culture Enthusiast Gifts

'I'm going to train you to 'Confront Difficult People'... okay, raise your hands if you're a difficult person.'

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Staff support"

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

The Evolution of the Bonus

"We have an acronym!"

"At this office no two days are different."

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

Parade of Businessmen

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

"Do you have a minute, Bob? I'd like to speak with you about the concept of 'leadership'."

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"I think you might need to start again."

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

Now that I finally have an expense account, there's no time to eat.

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"I think we should try something a little simpler."

"We don't have an exercise room here. You'll stay in shape by climbing the ladder, jumping through hoops, toeing the line..."