Community College Instructor Pillows

'I know crime doesn't pay, Dean Fenton, but neither does being an adjunct educator of philosophy at a community college.'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Hmph. College kids.'

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Kirsten Johnson

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

Subatomic particles

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

The Giamatti era

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

Smart Bomb.

"I wouldn't mind...But he's the teacher."

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

"I can't believe I'm paying $5,000 a month for you to stream Intro to Psychology when I get all of TV for $15.99."

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

'Professor Higgenbottom will have the number π and I'll have the number √-i.'

'New career low - gave out a page of Ulysses to my freshmen and they thought it was a wordsearch.'

"This is a teaching hospital."

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

Professor Isaac goes off on another tangent.

Laboratory: Protons /Electrons/Morons

Ilyasah Shabazz