Communication Whiz T-Shirts

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'

Explaining it on layman's terms

"Once you get over the three hundred and sixty eight texts it took to plan this, it really is nice to get together."

"Don't blame me,lady - that's where your husband told me to put it."

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

"Ambitions... to be able to keep a secret"

"She's exceptionally fluent in body as a second language."

"Captain, we're headed straight toward a big gaping hole of needs!"

It's important to know what to do when the communication technology doesn't work.

'This came in from somewhere. Could you send it somewhere else?'

The Communicator

"Steve found it hard to express his feelings."

'Wow, look! You have 5 new unread emails!'

The Woman Who Could Talk to Engineers...

"Staff support"

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

Out and In.

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Evolution.

Multi-tasking.

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

Letter Collecting Nerd

'We've cut and pasted your list into 84 arbitrary sub-lists. Well, our work here is done.'