Commodity Geek T-Shirts

August 2011: Gold passes oil as the most valuable commodity to invest in.

Lighthouse has energy efficient light bulb.

Aggressive growth fund loses money shorting gold.

"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."

'They don't want to destroy us. They want to cause just enough damage to lower our bond rating.'

Early attempts at standardising currency.

". . . We're being sucked into the UK national debt!"

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

"Squawk! Interest rates are going negative!"

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

Euro against the Dollar.

"Wash your hands after handling these, Miss Utley -- They're toxic securities."

"We're going to need more pets."

"We've had too much rain - they don't have enough - we'll sell our rain and make millions!"

Offshore tax havens.

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

'Our portfolio is not going anywhere. I'm going to add some transportation stocks to the mix to see if that will move our investments along.'

S**t Creek Halt

"Don't worry Mac, I'll have that happy face back in no time."

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

'Ms. Clayton, we're counting on you to reverse this trend...'

Famous Pieces of Paper

Foxconn: Outsourcer Outsources Outsourced...What?

"The government's finance settlement is coming out really late this year!"

"I see your point, but wouldn't it be more fun to spend it while I'm young enough to enjoy it?"

'Bit of an over reaction to a world-wide shortage of bismuth, don't you think?'

'Hey! This box of 'made in America' stickers has a sticker on it that says 'made in Taiwan'.'

We cater to the small investor.

Helms Burton Title III

Sold in May and went away.

'If there's going to be a double dip, who's joining me in the pub?'

'I'm pretty sure this means the price has finally hit bottom.'

"We're a monopolyopoly. Our company that owns 13 subsidiaries which put on a darn good imitation of competition."

Dow Jones

Bank of England Base Rates.