Comical Gardener T-Shirts

An Unexpected Guest.

"I'm trying to acquire a taste for weeds. It's the only thing that seems to grow in our garden. If I can't beat them, I might as well join them."

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

The Phantom Of The Garden

'It says right here on the package, Ed, 'avoid any direct contact with skin'!'

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

Paving over the window-box

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

Man is injured transporting cacti.

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

Hydroponic Gardening

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'It's only a slug Norman.'

A flower beats up another flower - Genetically Engineered plants tend to be more aggressive than naturally grown ones.

"Gnomeschooling is harder than I thought!"

Wet weather footwear - shoes that are shaped like boats.

"When is it time to stop smelling the roses and suck up the nectar?"

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

'What if your tree grows, Burl? Won't it choke to death?'

God builds the first lawn mower.

Crazy paving company.

'We want the garden to be stamped with my husband's personality.'

'Every summer, dandelions can't wait to go topless!'